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2005 - The Big Clown Off
Clown Pat

Well overdue and highly anticipated, the Clown-Off is
here. Who will win?

 Predictions:
Red's Regional
John Travolta has the toughest road for any #1 seed.
While Nic Cage and Travolta have struggled for King of
Clowns, Travolta might find winning the Clown-Off an
even tougher competition. Up and coming Clown Toby
Keith might be "Shock'N Y'all" with an upset of this
Clown. Still, I see Clowntown will be faithful to it's
Clown Deity and advance Travolta in a bad seed for
Keith. After Keith, Travolta must battle the likes of
Top Clowns Dennis Rodman, Eminem, Jesse Jackson and
Jose Canesco. I am calling for an upset in this
region, with Rodman facing off against Jose Canseco
for a trip to the Final Clown.

Woodman's Regional
Oprah Winfrey is like a 16-13 North Carolina team,
dangling dangerously in a #9 seed. I think when voters
consider her wide appeal to Clown the world, Bill
Clinton might find himself in a tough battle in the
second round. A weak bracket, it offers marginal
Clowns like Vanilla Ice, Brittney Spears, and the Back
Street Boys, all artists who have flamed out due to
their lack of ability. A true Clown overcomes their
inability to continously annoy us. That is why I see
an epic battle in the regional semi's between France
and Puff Daddy to face Oprah Winfrey in the regional
final.

The Patriot Regional

Nic Cage should roll, despite a tough second round
matchup with JLO. JLO's only chance is to back Cage
low under the basket with her huge ass. If she can,
she may pull off the upset. After that, I see a
possible upset with Jar Jar over Hillary.

Washington Tavern division

Can anyone stop the Weirdness of Michael Jackson?
Howard Dean will get steamrolled like it's an Iowa
caucus, and after that the only way Jackson can get
stopped is by an oddly seeded #6 Mike Tyson.In what
looks like a Final Clown matchup, Tyson proves he's
the only one who can matchup with Jackson's backcourt
of pedophilia and theme parks, with his tandem of
cannibalism and outrageously insane thoughts. A
personal favorite Clown Dr. Phil gets outmatched early
against George Lucas.

Final Clown Predictions

Dennis Rodman defeats France

Michael Jackson defeats Nic Cage

Michael Jackson defeats Rodman as King of Clowns, King
of Pop and Overall King of Oddest People ever.