January 2002	February 2002	March 2002
Milwaukee Brewers	XIX Winter Games	Derek Bell
Glendon Rusch? No D'Amico? Clowntown	X-Games or Winter Olympics? Everybody gets gold!	Operation Clowntown
April 2002	May 2002	June 2002
Sam Snead	France	9th Circuit Federal Court
90+ years old? First shot at the masters? Spectators? Fore!	Just Because	Under God is Unconstitutional! No wait, it's not. Uh, yes it is! No, yes, no. We'll get back to ya...
July 2002	August 2002	September 2002
2002 MLB All-Star Game	Caesar Barber	IMF Protestors
There's no tying in baseball! Rockets gave glare?	You mean a Big Mac has FAT? What else? KFC isn't lean chicken??! Whaaaat?!?!?!	Stupid Protestors want to be part of something rather than fighting for a cause. Stupid hippies!
October 2002	November 2002	December 2002
Thunderstix	Michael Jackson	Nicolas Cage
The X-Games World Series threatens the dignity & prestige of America's greatest game. For Shame.....	Baby-Balcony... clown	Lisa-Marie, Directed Sonny, and his acting can't be good in Adaptation